They had great advice/wisdom to share. There are certain things that I know I will struggle with but especially having my own pity parties. I got pretty good at that these last two years. I would get caught in this trap of "This is so hard. I am the only person who knows how difficult this is. This is so much harder than ____." (in regards to infertility). When of course this wasn't reality. My friend reminded me tonight that it will be VERY tempting to fall back into the pity party routine and to pray against that. To remember that I'm not the first or only person to ever have twins. I may have to tattoo this to my head. ;)
1.This is a season.
2.Be on the same team as Matt.
3.No pity parties.
4.God chose them to be twins and B to be their sibling. Let Him shape their personalities and mold them. Don't worry about them not getting enough one-on-one time. Recognize the benefits to that.
5.Life will get better after one year (oy.)
6.Be willing to accept help (no problems there).
7.God chose us to be their parents...and these babies are a blessing!
She also gave me advice on the practical things like what were twin necessities. So far I know I need a twin nursing pillow, two swings, two cribs, and to reacquaint myself with Baby Wise. That book was awesome in helping train Blair to sleep and she said it was the same with her twins. She advised to always keep them on the same schedule. Basically keeping them on the same schedule is more important than the actual schedule (if that makes sense). She told me sleep would be obsolete (I figured) and that this time around M would suffer more because with two babies having a second set of hands is not optional.
We talked about superficial things like how one piece swim suits will forever be my friend. We also talked about how these babies will be different than Blair because we waited and prayed for them for so long. It definitely changes your perspective. Any advice from twin mamas out there?
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*Don't make it harder than it has to ("keep it simple, stupid" is my mantra!).
ReplyDelete*Don't buy 2 of everything. Buy one and see if they actually like it...we only bought 2 cribs, 2 bouncers and 2 rock n plays.
*Everything is a phase and it will pass (even the good stuff...WHAAAA!).
*Make one on one time for each baby.
*Life gets better after 3 months...those first 3 are TOUGH. Accept that it will be hard (really hard) but you will get through it!
*Find a schedule that works for you and STICK TO IT. Seriously, you may need to tweak your social life for a while (Brunch and day dates are the new normal) but it's so worth it to have babies that sleep 10+ hours at a clip.
* Read this every. single. day. - stolen from ScaryMommy
"You have been chosen, super woman. You were blessed in this life to bring two warriors into this world. It won’t be easy but that doesn’t mean that it won’t be the most rewarding adventure that was entrusted to you. You are in charge of your greatness and theirs. There will be a moment that you could spill open with radiance because your life is so whole and you wouldn’t want to change it for anything. Acknowledge the joy and hope of it all as each joyous and hopeful inch comes your way. And know that you are a rockstar. You’ve got this. Own that cape, baby."
*Shower every day :).
It's a wild ride but truly, the best one I've ever taken.
How exciting that you are twining!!!! Scary but exciting!
ReplyDeleteYou will be a great twin mama! I love her advice that God made them twins and Blair their sibling- isn't that the truth! Such a blessing- hope you're feeling ok!
ReplyDeleteYes to all of that advice. Sleep has been rough the first year, but it will get better and you will get more of it. And yes M will have to help out more. You need the extra set of hands and have to be a team. Keep that twin nursing pillow even after you are done nursing because you can use it to feed the babies their bottles in it. We still use it when we give them their nighttime bottles.
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